Reducing Stress Part 4

Are you stressed?  Depressed?  Have anxiety in you life that you want to get rid of?  We have talked about way to reduce stress and here is another way to do that..... Exercise.  I know, I know.....this is the LAST thing you want to do.  After-all you don't have any energy because your stress, depression and anxiety has taken it all.  I promise you this....if you exercise you will feel better.

According to the Mayo Clinic (you know how much I love the Mayo Clinic):

How does exercise help depression and anxiety?

Exercise probably helps ease depression in a number of ways, which may include:

• Releasing feel-good brain chemicals that may ease depression (neurotransmitters and endorphins)

• Reducing immune system chemicals that can worsen depression

• Increasing body temperature, which may have calming effects

Exercise has many psychological and emotional benefits too. It can help you:

• Gain confidence. Meeting exercise goals or challenges, even small ones, can boost your self-confidence. Getting in shape can also make you feel better about your appearance.

• Take your mind off worries. Exercise is a distraction that can get you away from the cycle of negative thoughts that feed anxiety and depression.

• Get more social interaction. Exercise may give you the chance to meet or socialize with others. Just exchanging a friendly smile or greeting as you walk around your neighborhood can help your mood.

• Cope in a healthy way. Doing something positive to manage anxiety or depression is a healthy coping strategy. Trying to feel better by drinking alcohol, dwelling on how badly you feel, or hoping anxiety or depression will go away on its own can lead to worsening symptoms.

I don't want to exercise:

You are in luck!  The Mayo Clinic has some suggestions:

What kind of exercise is best?

The word "exercise" may make you think of running laps around the gym. But exercise includes a wide range of activities that boost your activity level to help you feel better. Certainly running, lifting weights, playing basketball and other fitness activities that get your heart pumping can help. But so can gardening, washing your car, or strolling around the block and other less intense activities. Anything that gets you off the couch and moving is exercise that can help improve your mood.

You don't have to do all your exercise at once either. Broaden how you think of exercise and find ways to fit activity into your routine. Add small amounts of physical activity throughout your day. For example, take the stairs instead of the elevator. Park a little farther away from your work to fit in a short walk. Or, if you live close to your job, consider biking to work.

Not sure you want to?  What do you have to lose?  Stress, Depression, Anxiety...that's what!!  Give it a try and get healthy at the same time!

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Reducing stress Part 3

There is one word in the English language that will help you reduce stress.  It helps you avoid many things that in life that could cause stress.

This word is NO!

I know, easier said than done but practice it with me....ready....set......NO!!



When you are asked to help volunteer AGAIN for a cause and your first thought is "ugh, is it that time already" or "I just don't have the time" say NO!  Saying no does NOT make you a bad person but saying yes could make you feel bad....and that bad is stress and you can't help anyone when you are not at your best.  Saying no may make you "feel bad" for the moment but will reduce your stress in the long run.

Another thing to say NO to is any conversation that "drains you" or will become a heated conversation.  Earlier we talked about avoiding the friend conversation who always has a problem.  I want to expand on that one.  Avoid ALL conversations that could lead to a heated discussion; religion & politics are good examples of this but your list may contain a few more topics.  If your are right wing and your friend is left wing this time of year is a difficult one.  When you are with your friend don't bring up the subject of politics.  If the subject is brought up, "wow. look at the time sorry but I need to get going."  Just say NO to those conversations.

Just say NO to the news if you find yourself worrying or getting upset or mad about everything on news.  Turn the channel or turn it off.  Trust me....if it is something you need to know it will be on again.  

Remember, you will not be ANY good to ANY one if you are stressed.  So remember this:

A:  Always
N:  No before 
Y:  Yes

ANY will allow you to say no first.  You will than be able to "think" about it without the immediate pressure of being in the moment.  

Come back and learn what you can do to reduce stress when you can't say NO.

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Reducing Stress Part 2

You have so much to do you just want to DO NOTHING
Some days you just have to do nothing. Other days it's time for a plan!
Words to live by (click here and come back and read)

I love this story:

A man came home from work and found his 3 children outside, still in their pyjamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn around garden, The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and no
sign of the dog, walking in the door, he found ...an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, the throw rug was against one wall, In the front room the TV was on loudly with the cartoon channel, the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls. As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pyjamas, reading a novel... She looked up at him, smiled and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened here today?' She again smiled and answered, 'You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world do I do all day?...
''Yes," was his incredulous reply..
She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it.' ♥

So you do this occasionally....but what about the rest of the time?  What do you do to reduce your stress.

Prioritize you to do list:

• Easy to do with a big impact
• Easy to do with a small impact
• Hard to do with a big impact
• Hard to do with an easy impact

and you do your to-do list in this order.  Everybody's definition of "easy to do" and "impact" are different.  Personally unloading the dryer and/or dishwasher fall under the HARD TO DO column and I despise these chores so much it doesn't matter the impact.  

This can be done at home or at work.  No matter what is on your "to do" list and no matter where it is put it in these categories and tackle each one at a time.  The easy to do with a big impact list...once it is completed you will feel so much better because you accomplished a BIG IMPACT.  

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Reducing Stress: Part 1

If you have been following this blog you know about good stress vs. bad stress.  Over the next few blogs we are going to discuss some simple things you can do to reduce stress in your life.




Negative out is negative in.  
We all have that friend who are mostly negative.  Everything in their life is negative and they love "dumping" it on you.  We don't want to be a "bad friend" so we listen.  Negative out of them is negative into us.  We cannot help but "react" to what they are saying:

• Their job is horrible
• Their spouse is horrible
• Their child(ren) are out of control
• They never have enough money to pay their bills
• Their car broke down

The list goes on and on and on and on.  Each day there is something different.  Some days it repeats something that you heard a week or month ago.

Some people just absorb the energy of those around us.  If you are surrounded by happy people you can't help but be happy.  If you are with someone who is negative you can't help but feel stressed.

So how do reduce YOUR stress of listening without being a bad friend?  

Here's what I do (not that it will work with everyone)

• Allow that friend five minutes to tell me what is "wrong" in their life.  (I will actually tell them they have only five minutes and I will actually clock the time).
• Once the five minutes are up I allow them five minutes to tell me how they are going to solve the problem.  (I prompt this by saying, "okay so your child isn't listening what can you do to fix that?)
• After that five minutes (10 minutes total) I turn the conversation to something positive about that person.  (At this time I don't talk about positive things in my life).
• Now you can have a normal conversation without the negative portions which keeps you from getting stressed.

If my friend continues to come back to the same negative conversation over a period of time (example: my boss is a jerk) I will tell my friend, "I am sorry about your situation but for the next week, month, etc. you cannot talk about your boss unless it is positive).  I have found that the person who is mostly negative continues to be negative if all they say is negative things.  

Eliminate the stress that you take on from others by changing your reaction to it.  It starts with change.  Change requires a plan.  By reducing your stress in this situation you may help your friend become a more positive person with more positive thoughts. Win Win!

Keep coming back for more ways to reduce stress in situations.

How do you reduce stress with your friends.  Please comment, maybe what you do will help someone else.

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How to reduce stress in your life

Let's face it...if you aren't stressed you know someone who is, right?  Stress is as common as drinking water.  Stress is unavoidable so what do you do to reduce your stress?  Earlier blog I talked about "good" stress vs. "bad" stress.  Today we will focus on how to reduce the stress in your life so the good doesn't turn into the bad and the bad doesn't affect your health.

I love the Mayo Clinic so I went there first to find out what they say:

• Decide to make the change on how stress affects you and how you react to stress:  Simple enough....not gonna let things bother me anymore.  Okay, maybe not THAT simple but making the decision to change is always the FIRST step in change.
• Identify your stress "triggers."  Now this one is going to be fun....I suggest grabbing a piece of paper because life is crazy today.  For me, driving into town (I live in a suburb outside of a city) and just thinking about driving into the city gets me stressed (and it's not a big city).  Your job (this may pose a problem if it's "your job" and not aspects of your job). Your spouse (oops another problem.....maybe put on your list when my spouse does.....), your children (okay, if you have teenagers, just put teenage children we will all understand) but if it's babysitter issues i.e. getting them to and from, etc. than be specific. You cannot fix what you do not acknowledge so BE SPECIFIC.
• Don't forget on your list to put down the "positive" things that happen in your life that cause stress; marriage, birth of a child, VACATION (I know this seems crazy because vacations are supposed to reduce stress.....just plan one one time within a strict budget)

Now comes the attack plan:  How do you reduce or eliminate what is on your list?  Let's take "commute to work" as a stressor you need to reduce or eliminate.  What exactly is it that causes stress for the commute?  Is it traffic?  Cost of gas?  Running late?  Time it takes to get there?  Plan your work, work your plan.  If it's traffic can you leave a little earlier or later to avoid it?  If it's the cost of gas can you car pool or maybe work from home a few days (this would help with the traffic stress also).  Do you run late?  I have learned that people fall into three categories: laters, earliers or on-timers....and occasionally will do something different.  I, personally, am an "earlier" person...if I am not 15 minutes early somewhere I AM LATE.  Those of you who always run late cause stress on me and I have A LOT of people like that in my life.  I don't have much advice for those of you who run late all the time as I don't understand how you can always be 5 minutes late.  If you can be "on-time" 5 minutes late...than just be on-time.  If you are stressed about the amount of time it takes you to commute talk to your boss about moving to 4-10 hour days, work from home a few days, or...yes, look for a job closer to your home.

Attack each stressor on your list and come up with several solutions to tackle that stress.  If one doesn't work...move to the next way to attack it.  Keep trying and keep thinking of ways to eliminate or reduce your stress.

Find a way to relax whether it be exercise, reading, resting, mini-vacations, walking your dog, etc.  Do what you enjoy.  Take time every day for YOU!  Even if it is just five minutes to start out with...it will get easier and better with practice!!

Please tell me how you relieve stress.

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